Are your product descriptions falling flat? Email campaigns getting ignored? You may be committing one of the 7 deadly sins of ecommerce copywriting - mistakes that are killing your sales and conversions. In this post, we’ll go over these copywriting sins, why they’re so damaging, and how to fix them for good.

Sin #1: Fluff and Clichés

Example: “Our revolutionary new serum is a game-changer that will transform your skin!”

The Problem: This type of hypey, vague marketing copy is a turnoff. It uses cliché claims like “revolutionary” and “game-changer” without providing any concrete details about the product’s benefits or why the customer should care. Overused words like “transform” are empty hype without real substantiation.

This sin is damaging because it undermines credibility and comes across as insincere. Customers have been bombarded with this style of marketing fluff for years, so they’re numb to it. Clichéd copy makes you blend into the noise instead of standing out.

The Fix: Replace fluff and clichés with specifics that build value and credibility. Highlight key ingredients, results from clinical trials, or testimonials from real customers. For example:

Our new vitamin C serum features a concentrated 20% L-ascorbic acid formula, clinically proven to reduce wrinkles by 37% after 6 weeks in third-party testing.

After just 2 weeks of using this retinol cream, 82% of users reported firmer, more youthful-looking skin based on a recent study.

These tangible details turn hype into substance that resonates. Customers are bombarded with vague claims, so lean into hard facts and evidence that sell the product’s benefits.

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.

Sin #2: Missing Emotional Hooks

The Problem: A lot of product descriptions are dry lists of specs and features with no emotional punch. They read like robotic fact-sheets rather than inspiring desire for the product. But buying decisions are rooted in emotion, not just logic. If the copy doesn’t tap into aspirations and make an emotional connection, it will fail to persuade.

According to a study by Harvard professor Gerald Zaltman, 95% of purchasing decisions are subconscious and driven by emotion. The facts and features lay the groundwork, but triggering emotional motivators is what drives people to take action.

The Fix: Weave emotional motivators throughout the copy that trigger cravings. Don’t just list the 12MP camera, say “capture ultra-clear memories that transport you back to your favorite adventures.” Instead of “lightweight design,” say “pack light and open up a world of spontaneous adventure.” Paint those aspirational visions that people crave.

Use sensory descriptions, storytelling, and psychological motivators like belonging, status, and autonomy. Appeal to their hopes, desires and deeper human drivers. Features tell, but emotions sell.

Sin #3: Boring Product Specs (aka Leaving Out Benefits)

The Problem: A common trap is listing all the product's features and specs, but never actually explaining the real-world benefits to the customer. A camera’s megapixel count means nothing if you don’t convey why it allows you to take better photos. Features tell what it is, but benefits sell why they should want it.

According to Hubspot, 90% of customers say product benefits are the top factor impacting their purchasing decisions. Yet their research found that only 14% of ecommerce sites actually lead with real benefits in their product copy.

The Fix: For every key feature, spell out the concrete advantage it delivers to the user’s life. Noise-canceling headphones = crystal clear calls without distractions. Stain-resistant fabric = spill worry-free. Use this “feature = benefit” formula to articulate the value proposition in a tangible, compelling way.

People don’t buy features, they buy better versions of themselves and their lives. Translate those technical specs into real, emotional benefits they can envision and get excited about.

Sin #4: Inconsistent Brand Voice

The Problem: When product descriptions, website copy, emails, and social posts all read like they were written by completely different people, it creates a disjointed, untrustworthy brand experience. Maintaining a cohesive voice and personality is critical for building brand recognition and rapport.

Research by Lucidpress found that consistent presentation of a brand increases revenue by 33%. And when brand messaging is inconsistent, it can cause an average 23% revenue drop.

The Fix: Clearly define your brand’s voice with traits like funny/witty, authoritative/trustworthy, or casual/conversational. Use a content style guide to document approved language, formatting, and tone. This ensures your copy always reinforces your unique brand identity no matter the channel.

For example, Skittles is famous for its whimsical, trippy brand voice that shines through in product copy like “Taste the rainbow.” Maintain that distinct personality across all your marketing touchpoints.

Sin #5: Ignoring Search Intent

The Problem: Even if your product copy is well-written, it will underperform if it doesn’t actually match the search intent and context of your audience. If someone searches for “affordable summer dresses” but your copy focuses on high-end designer gowns, you’ve missed the mark.

Search intent is the main goal or reason behind a user’s search query. Not aligning with that intent leads to a poor experience and low conversions.

A study by Infront Webworks found that pages optimized for intent outperformed pages not optimized by over 300%.

The Fix: Research the core queries and search terms your audience uses. Identify the dominant intent behind those searches - whether it’s informational, navigational, commercial or transactional intent. Then, optimize your product copy to directly satisfy that specific intent.

For example, if most searches are for “best affordable standing desks,” your copy should address budget considerations and emphasize value. If it’s “standing desk health benefits,” prioritize copy covering the health/productivity advantages.

Sin #6: Weak Call-to-Actions

The Problem: You can have the most persuasive product descriptions, but if you don’t give customers a clear, compelling call-to-action to follow, they’ll likely abandon and your conversion rates will plummet. CTAs are the crucial trigger to drive a purchase.

Research by HubSpot found that 90% of people say a clear call-to-action on a website is crucial for getting their attention and taking action. Yet their data showed that 70% of small business websites lack a clear CTA altogether.

The Fix: Include a prominent, benefit-driven call-to-action after every major product description. Add to cart while supplies last. Buy now to get free 2-day shipping. Make it clear, clicky and incentivized.

Craft CTAs that eliminate hesitation and convey urgency. Highlight the key benefit they’ll get by clicking. And make sure the CTA stands out with contrasting colors, whitespace and actionable language.

Sin #7: Not Optimizing for Mobile

The Problem: With over 50% of web traffic now coming from mobile devices, not optimizing your ecommerce copy for small screens is a huge missed opportunity. Tiny text, dense copy blocks, and poor spacing create frustration and abandonment.

According to Google research, 61% of mobile users said if they didn’t find what they were looking for right away on a mobile site, they’d quickly move on to another site. And over half said that a bad mobile experience made them less likely to engage with that company altogether.

The Fix: Adopt a “mobile-first” mentality for all your product copy. Use shorter sentences and sections with ample line breaks. Optimize formatting with larger text, bulleted lists, and strategic use of subheadings. Design tap-friendly CTAs with ample spacing.

Test your mobile experience rigorously and prioritize fast load times. Leverage mobile preview tools to identify issues like text overflow, improper scaling, or slow shifts in orientation. Make it seamless for mobile users to skim, engage and convert.

Remember that optimizing eCommerce copy is an ongoing process. But dodge these 7 deadly sins, and you’ll create high-converting pages and content that resonates.

Sources:

1. Zaltman, G. (2003). How Customers Think: Essential Insights into the Mind of the Market. Harvard Business School Press.

2. Hubspot. (2022). The Fundamentals of Product Marketing.

3. Lucidpress. (2018). The Importance of Brand Consistency.

4. Google. (2016). How mobile consumers deal with mobile marketing.

5. Infront Webworks. (2021). The Importance of Search Intent Optimization.

The 7 Deadly Sins of Ecommerce Copy (And How to Avoid Them)